Seinfeld Episodes, Ranked

Ten episodes about nothing, ranked by how much nothing.

Entries
10
Category
TV
Updated
  1. A baseball glove and a first baseman's mitt on a couch in a 90s apartment, a grassy knoll diagram pinned to the wall.

    10. The Boyfriend

    Seinfeld · 1992

    Jerry gets a man-crush on former Met Keith Hernandez, and Kramer and Newman's grudge against him gets the full JFK conspiracy treatment, Zapruder film and all. The episode was a double-length special. It is still the best courtroom scene shot in an apartment.

  2. An operating room viewed from an observation gallery, a single chocolate mint mid-air above the surgical table.

    09. The Junior Mint

    Seinfeld · 1993

    Kramer and Jerry watch a surgery from the gallery and a chocolate mint falls into the patient. The patient recovers better than expected. Andy Robin wrote it, and the episode also turns on Jerry forgetting his girlfriend's name, which rhymes with a body part. Very refreshing.

  3. A billowing white ruffled pirate shirt on a hanger in front of a television studio set with two empty chairs.

    08. The Puffy Shirt

    Seinfeld · 1993

    Jerry nods along to Kramer's low-talking girlfriend without hearing her, which commits him to wearing her ruffled pirate shirt on the Today show. George becomes a hand model, briefly. The real shirt is now in the Smithsonian. Lesson: never just nod.

  4. A plastic medical bubble over a bed in a wood-paneled den, a board game and question cards scattered on the floor.

    07. The Bubble Boy

    Seinfeld · 1992

    George plays Trivial Pursuit with a boy who lives in a plastic bubble and insists the card's misprint, Moops instead of Moors, is the official answer. The bubble does not survive the dispute. Larry David and Larry Charles wrote it. The card backed George, technically.

  5. A Yankee Stadium front office desk with a turkey sandwich, a chicken salad on rye and a baseball on a stand.

    06. The Opposite

    Seinfeld · 1994

    George decides every instinct he has is wrong and does the opposite, and immediately lands a woman and a job with the New York Yankees. Elaine's life falls apart as his improves, and Kramer goes on a talk show. The best career advice the show ever gave.

  6. A restaurant waiting area with a host podium, a reservation book, a red lantern and a pay phone on the wall.

    05. The Chinese Restaurant

    Seinfeld · 1991

    Jerry, Elaine and George wait for a table at a Chinese restaurant and the episode never leaves the lobby. NBC executives reportedly hated it and asked where the story was. That was the point. Larry David and Jerry Seinfeld won the argument and invented the show.

  7. A concrete parking garage level with identical rows of cars, a window air-conditioning unit sitting on the floor and a goldfish bag.

    04. The Parking Garage

    Seinfeld · 1991

    The gang forgets where they parked at a mall garage and wanders the levels for the whole episode, with Kramer carrying an air conditioner. Larry David wrote it. Twenty-two minutes of looking for a car. Network television at its bravest.

  8. A beached whale on a gray shore at dusk with a single golf ball on the sand and a golf club stuck upright nearby.

    03. The Marine Biologist

    Seinfeld · 1994

    George, pretending to be a marine biologist, wades into the ocean to save a beached whale and pulls out a golf ball Kramer drove into its blowhole. He tells the story in a diner monologue that is basically Homeric. The best lie George ever turned into a truth.

  9. A small soup counter window with steaming pots, ladles and a single loaf of bread at the end of a long empty line.

    02. The Soup Nazi

    Seinfeld · 1995

    Spike Feresten based the tyrannical soup man on Al Yeganeh, who ran a real Manhattan soup stand and was famously strict about ordering. Elaine gets banned and then ruins him with his own recipes. Yeganeh was not pleased. The soup was reportedly worth it.

  10. Four stacks of cash on a diner table beside a coffee cup, with a window across an airshaft showing a lit apartment.

    01. The Contest

    Seinfeld · 1992

    Larry David's script has the four friends bet on a matter of personal self-control, and the episode never once names the thing they are betting on. It won the Emmy for writing and got past NBC's censors on euphemism alone. Kramer is out within minutes. George, somehow, lasts.

Honorable mentions

  • A bare aluminum pole standing in a living room next to a dinner table set for a holiday meal.

    The Strike

    Seinfeld · 1997

    Frank Costanza's anti-holiday Festivus, with its bare aluminum pole and airing of grievances, came from writer Dan O'Keefe's father, who invented it at home. Real people now celebrate it every December 23. No tinsel required. The grievances are the decorations.

Dishonorable mentions

  • A small-town jail cell with a bench and four empty paper coffee cups lined up on the floor.

    The Finale

    Seinfeld · 1998

    The four are arrested under a Good Samaritan law in Massachusetts, and a parade of past guest characters testifies against them. Around 76 million people watched and many hated it. Larry David returned to write it, then rebutted the critics years later on Curb Your Enthusiasm.

Every list.
On tap.

No newsletter. Point your AI at our public MCP server, or follow the RSS feed. New lists show up in both.

Get the MCP RSS