Movies With Unnecessary Narration

Ten films that did not trust you, said so out loud, and kept talking.

Entries
10
Category
Film
Updated
  1. A red leather glove clutching the base of a church cross on a rooftop in the rain.

    10. Daredevil

    Mark Steven Johnson · 2003

    Opens on Matt Murdock bleeding in a church, telling you your life flashes before your eyes when you die, then flashing his. Then he narrates it. The Netflix series later did the same character without the guided tour, and it went fine.

  2. A pair of angel wings made of paper hanging above a samurai sword and a stuffed teddy bear in a dim asylum hallway.

    09. Sucker Punch

    Zack Snyder · 2011

    Bookended by a speech that everyone has an angel and that you have all the weapons you need, so fight. Critics heard it as a fortune cookie with a gun. The narration explains the theme, then the movie explains it again with dragons. Snyder appears twice here. Fair.

  3. A red and blue spool of thread caught on a fire escape in Queens, a thin web glinting in morning light.

    08. Spider-Man

    Sam Raimi · 2002

    Peter Parker opens by asking who he is, whether you are sure you want to know, and promising the story is all about a girl. The poster had already answered the first question. Raimi's film is a delight; the voiceover is a guy explaining a movie you paid to see.

  4. A broken string of pearls bouncing on wet alley pavement beside a dropped pistol at night.

    07. Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice

    Zack Snyder · 2016

    Opens with Bruce Wayne reciting things fall, things on Earth over yet another staging of his parents' murder and some falling pearls. Audiences had seen that scene in several prior films. Narration for the eighth time is still narration for the first time, apparently.

  5. A marble balcony overlooking Alexandria at sunset, a scroll unrolled across a table with a quill and wine cup.

    06. Alexander

    Oliver Stone · 2004

    Anthony Hopkins as old Ptolemy narrates the conquest of the known world from a balcony, at length. Ebert said the battles were welcome because they freed you from the endless narration. Stone has since released four different cuts. The talking stayed.

  6. A large split seed pod oozing foam in a dim greenhouse, a truck's headlights approaching on a highway outside.

    05. Invasion of the Body Snatchers

    Don Siegel · 1956

    Allied Artists wanted a less bleak ending, so a frame story was added with Kevin McCarthy recounting it all to a psychiatrist. Siegel said the studio nearly ruined the film. The original ends on a man screaming at traffic. That one did not need a narrator.

  7. A blue-tinted city alley with a stack of exactly seventy thousand dollars in a cardboard box and a handgun.

    04. Payback

    Brian Helgeland · 1999

    After Helgeland was removed, reshoots added a new third act, Kris Kristofferson, and a Mel Gibson voiceover with quips. Helgeland's 2006 cut, Payback: Straight Up, removed the narration. Two versions of a revenge movie, and only one keeps explaining itself.

  8. A grid of rooftops under a permanent night sky, every clock face on the towers stopped at midnight.

    03. Dark City

    Alex Proyas · 1998

    New Line feared audiences would be lost, so Kiefer Sutherland's doctor explains the Strangers in the first few minutes, spoiling the mystery the movie spends the next hour building. Proyas hated it and his 2008 director's cut deletes it. A twist, delivered as a preface.

  9. A folded paper glossary lying on a desert dune beside a small blue glass vial of spice.

    02. Dune

    David Lynch · 1984

    Opens with Princess Irulan explaining the universe, then adds whispered inner thoughts from half the cast. Theaters also handed out a printed glossary of terms. Lynch later took his name off the TV version. When the movie needs a pamphlet, the narration is losing.

  10. A glass of whiskey on a rain-soaked apartment balcony overlooking a neon city at night, an old microphone cord coiled beside it.

    01. Blade Runner

    Ridley Scott · 1982

    Test audiences were confused, so the studio had Harrison Ford narrate the theatrical cut, over Scott's objections. Ford called the process a nightmare and denies he read it badly on purpose. Every later cut removed it. Tears in rain did not need subtitles.

Honorable mentions

  • A cowboy hat resting on a bowling alley bar next to a white Russian and a sarsaparilla.

    The Big Lebowski

    Joel Coen · 1998

    Sam Elliott's cowboy narrator loses his train of thought, admits he does not know where he is going with this, and steps up to the bar to chat with the Dude. Completely unnecessary. Also perfect. The exception that proves you can do it.

Dishonorable mentions

  • A deer drinking at a misty Pacific Northwest stream, a red apple balanced on a mossy log beside it.

    Twilight

    Catherine Hardwicke · 2008

    Bella opens over a deer in a forest, informing you she had never given much thought to how she would die. The deer does not survive. The franchise grossed billions anyway, which is the true lesson of narration: none of this was for us.

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